Can you fall in love twice? "Absolutely!" Kim and Krickett Carpenter would tell you. Krickett would say, "Yes! I did. It happened to me." Kim never stopped loving his beautiful sweetheart who had been his wife for only two months when their world fell apart. In a recent published book entitled "The Vow," they tell their story.
On the night of November 24, 1993, Kim and Krickett were on their way to visit Krickett's parents when they were involved in a terrible automobile accident that almost killed them both. Krickett, however, was in a coma for two weeks, and when she awoke, she had no short-term memory. When she was able to talk to Kim, who had recovered more quickly, she looked at him and said, "I don't know you. I don't want you; go back to where you came from," and she kept talking about Todd, her boyfriend of some four years before.
She knew her parents and remembered everything clearly that had happened years ago; but she could not recognize her husband. For Kim, it was like being married to a living dead. Statistics say that 80% to 90% of those who sustain brain damage end up divorcing their spouse. Why? Their personalities are altered and they are like strangers, sometimes even hostile ones at that.
Why didn't he give up on her? Kim answered, "When you make a vow before the Lord, you need to be a person of your word." Both Kim and Krickett were committed Christians and had taken their marriage vows seriously when they stood at a marriage altar and pledged their love to each other "till death do us part."
Kim stood by her, helped her in her rehabilitation, brought flowers for her, and the storybook ending to this near fatal tragedy is that eventually Kim and Krickett (wearing the same wedding dress that she had worn when she first took her vows) had another ceremony -- just like the first one -- reaffirming their love and commitment to each other. Love was born the second time in her heart for this man.
Can you learn to love the second time? When someone you love trampled on his or her vows and in a moment of thoughtless passion, violated the commitment he or she made, can love be reborn?
I'm thinking of a couple who sat with me only a few days ago. The husband began by saying, "There's nothing you can do to help us. We've been to many counselors and I don't think there is any hope for our marriage." I turned to them and said, "I'm sorry to hear that God has died, and with His death, any hope of His doing anything in your lives also expired!"
Unbelieving they looked at me as if I was crazy. "No," I said, as long as God and both of you are alive, there is hope that your love for each other can be rekindled."
Kim courted his wife just as he did the first time. They got to know each other and they talked about the Lord and what He had meant to each of them. Eventually, she learned to trust him, to love him, and to recommit herself to him.
Love is more than an emotion; it is a deep meaningful commitment and rediscovering that had made Kim and Krickett Carpenter's marriage a two-fold blessing which has endured the fire.
JOY PARTERS INTERNATIONAL by Harold J. Sala © 2001. All rights reserved. (Please include this line to forward).
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